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Who
of us is a "perfect parent"? There probably isn't such a beast!
Besides, one person's definition will be different from that of another. What
do we want for our children? Happiness? Responsibility? Good citizenship? Success?
We all do our best based upon our own experiences as children, both negative
and positive, what we have time to read, outside influences, our own
intuition, etc.
When my children were young and going through an unpleasant divorce, I
used a simple technique to try to ensure as smooth a passage as possible.
My son was seven and very much a "Daddy's boy", my much loved
daughter five. After their mother took them to live with someone else, my
son's head teacher said that he was the one child she thought was not
from a broken home. My children are far from perfect, obviously, but to my
knowledge they have never been arrested, smoked or taken drugs. They are now
in their twenties and enjoying their work and lives - even going on the
foreign holidays that we couldn't give them as children.
As a parent, surrogate parent, teacher (undertaking countless home visits),
counsellor and coach, I have worked with very many families over the years
and undertaken much research. Many studies that have been carried out in the U.S.A.
and other countries seldom get to our consciousness. For example, The Times
reported an 'experiment' carried out in a reform school the U.S.A.
whereby the teenage inmates were deprived of two common food ingredients.
Their behaviour improved dramatically - even the parents of those who were
allowed home visits remarked on the extraordinary improvements - and they
didn't know about the experiment!
My workshops and coaching help parents to avoid problems in adolescence. Drug
taking, crime, eating disorders really can be avoided in most
families. Nobody can know everything, and decisions concerning your family
are yours, not mine! But I can give you ideas, suggestions and techniques
that you may not come across by trial-and-error.
Who are you?
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Help your
children